I’ve been thinking a lot lately about what is real…and what’s not. Dealing with physical illness and chronic pain can shrink your reality super fast. You can begin to think that life is just about survival, and before you know it, real moments can pass you by because you were just trying to survive…to breathe.
There are definitely times in life when the only way through…is through, and you just have to put your head down and push through it.
The problem with anything that affects you on a chronic level is that it can become your only reality. When you’re in chronic pain or under chronic stress or in chronic depression or chronically obsessed with perfection…the reality is the same:
Your world has been shrunk down to just that one thing.
But today is Monday. Mondays are hard, but they are also wonderful. It just depends on my reality. Have I shrunk my reality to the point where I can’t see the possibility that lies in every day…especially every Monday?
Well, here’s where I am on this Monday:
I’m going to be tired…Monday-tired no matter what I do or don’t do. I’m going to be in pain…whether I do a lot or try to be still. I’ve got a lot on my plate, a big family, major health-decisions to make…and they will be there whether I choose to deal with them today or not.
I can’t change facts, but I can change my reality…
Because my true reality is not what’s going on around me…or even inside me…
My true reality is how I feel about it, what I tell myself about it, and what I allow it to motivate me to do or not do about it.
I spoke to my Doctor about this just a few hours ago… Dr. Brent Baldasare is my chiropractor, but the reality is that he’s my physician…you know, the one that I really listen to. I was sharing with him my frustrations about the decisions I have to make about possible treatments for the meningioma (benign brain tumor) that’s pressing on my brain stem and spinal cord. Nothing has changed as far as my physical condition, but lately I’ve been feeling hopeless and unmotivated…when I was much more certain and positive just a few weeks ago. I told him that I know I have to get my mojo back.
And he said, “Do you know the “Wonder Woman” stance?”
Know it? There are times when I think I invented it…and these are always the times when I feel the weakest, and somehow I just know that if I just tell myself I’m strong, then I’ll actually be stronger. I’ve done this for years when I sing. Anyone who has ever watched me lead worship, has probably seen me do the “Wonder Woman”…where I stand straight and strong or march forward on the platform. For me, this has always revolved around some lyric that is stating how “God is stronger” or “no weapon formed against me will stand”. I can do it when I’m leading worship…
…because when I’m leading worship it’s not about me. It’s about God. And I have no trouble believing or stating in a strong way that God is greater…
I just struggle to know that I am.
So Dr. B reminded me that I need to take my power back. The things that I can control about my health, my pain, my happiness, my faith, my family…are right in my own hands. I just need to stand up, strike the “Wonder Woman” and know that I can!
Byron said this very thing this weekend, “Perhaps you don’t struggle at all believing in God, you just struggle with the fact that He believes in you.”
And that’s truly my struggle: believing that I can.
Maybe that’s also where you are.
So let’s try it together…if we’re feeling overwhelmed, discouraged and powerless, the first step is to stand up, strike the “Wonder Woman”, look the world and our enemies right in the eye, and say by our stance that we will not be defeated.
It’s not just half the battle…it’s the whole thing because it can actually change our reality.
If we change our thoughts, we change our destiny, and begin to change the world!
Peace to you…